Becoming a Gay Adult

well, i'm going to visit williams. and in terror i visit with some black gay gathering at the lesbian and gay center and of course they had some trouble getting it together, and although it's fabulous, it's homeless: held in the lobby, under a wispy sculpture of an engorged penis from a detached torso, with classical music playing from some other event that eventually devolves to lesbian two-stepping... it's about relationships. and black gay men. and it's interesting, but no new territory is covered. a question wakes me from dozing: "would you date someone who is HIV+?" and of course, when you are HIV+ and people talk about you as if you're not in the room, like parents of a dazed and confused child, you listen carefully, you become acutely aware of your fate and how it's held in the hands of these people who are going to now make a decision and pronouncement about whether you're good enough to date. as if HIV+ people didn't have enoug