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When You Feel Giving Up Is the Next Step

Sometimes giving up feels like the next step. And that's a moment for major pause. It's usually smart to hold off at least 24 hours before taking action on the "give up" impulse.

This is when you call on your closest friends and family. It's time for an intervention. Giving up has major ramifications on your finances, your psychology and your health. So before you do that, please, call for emergency support. Consider yourself in the "red" zone.

That said, sometimes the feeling is exactly right. There may be some major action that is suggested. However, doing it on your own is usually less effective, than getting some input from those who have YOUR best interests at heart. Organizations are poorly designed (as in DNA of an organization) to put your interests first. So the support you want to turn to here is outside the office.

You also want to turn to industry/function network associates at this time as well. They might have a perspective on the industry or your function that is outside your radar. This can help to shape your decision-making when you feel like throwing in the towel.

Most of all, allow yourself to feel the feelings. You might still have to lead a presentation, give a meeting, do your performance review or deliver unpleasant news to someone else, even be a shoulder for someone else today. Draw on your innner Academy-Award performance actor and do it. The old truism, "never let them see you sweat," is the right one in these times. Those who need to know, spill your guts. Those whose loyalty TO YOU is questionable, never need to know. Your clients, vendors, supervisor may be inappropriate folks to bring into the conversation at this time. Wait for greater clarity first.

It's also good (if you have insurance) to explore therapy during these times as well. There may be underlying issues that are re-surfacing or surfacing for the first time that need your attention. It could be that once you've done that process, things look rosier.

So get at least one conversation scheduled today with a trusted person in your inner circle. Taking care of you is your primary responsibility. Instead of "never give up," I offer, "only give up, AFTER checking in with your inner circle." That of course means you want to work consciously to nurture and build that inner circle over time so they are present for you when you need them.

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